I'll Cover You (In Cream)
by rainbowrites
Summary: written for the prompt: "Okay let's see, how about some missing Blaine/Unique conversations about Jake and his womanizing ways from the last episode?" Aka, Blaine and Unique give each other facials and talk about boys


"That boy is _bad news_." Unique muttered, stirring the yoghurt a little harder than was strictly necessary. Blaine carefully slid the _People_ magazines out of the splash zone. "I can't believe we're letting him in."

"Glee is a place for everyone." Blaine said automatically.

Unique gave a very indelicate snort. "Sure, when they're not competition you mean?"

Blaine swallowed. "Unique, I –"

She waved a perfectly manicured hand. "I know how it is. You need to get out to your boy, and New York don't accept _anyone_ who isn't Rachel Berry." She dumped in the oatmeal. "You can have New York. Us strong black women gotta stick together in LA."

Blaine grinned. "How is Mercedes?"

"She's Mercedes darling, she's _fabulous_."

"Of course, of course." Blaine's smile faded a little. He fiddled with his spoon. "I think that Glee could be good for Jake. I mean, Puck was apparently way worse than Jake ever was and he ended up being a really good guy." He'd never seen Jake at Fight Club, even after he started looking. He didn't know whether to be relieved or worried about that.

"Good for him maybe, but what about us?" Unique said dryly, raising an eyebrow.

"We need new members," He glanced around self-consciously, before leaning in and lowering his voice. "Besides, you can't tell me you wouldn't mind having a face like that hanging around in the choir room." It's weirdly thrilling to be discussing boys like this, with someone other than Kurt.

Unique sighed dramatically. "The boy is many things, but unattractive will never be one them." She eyed her mixture critically. "I think it's done."

"Kurt usually makes rose water facials." Blaine said automatically, and then winced. Unqiue had laid down an iron clad five times rule for Kurt. He only had two mentions left, and they'd only been there for half an hour.

"Unique's skin is like a rum chocolate soufflé," Unique sniffed. "Don't treat it right and it won't rise."

Blaine rolled his eyes. Unique smacked him on the head with her fan. "Hey!"

She pointed at him with the fan. He eyed it warily. He'd seen how Unique's threatened Artie after the whole _new Rachel_ debacle. "If you keep rolling your eyes, you're gonna get crows feet no matter _how_ much moisturizing we do. Besides, you're at McKinley now" She sniffed. "You gotta keep your eye rolls for the _real_ stuff. Ration them out."

Blaine nodded. It was very true. He picked up the bowl. "You first, then me?" She nodded.

"Unique's face requires a lot of time and love. Gotta baby this skin, with all the make up goes on it." She said, closing her eyes. She cracked the right one open, and Blaine was pretty sure he saw Wade peeking through. "But she's worth it."

"Most things just need a little work to help make them great." He smoothed the yoghurt over Unique's cheeks. "You just need to give them the time and help they need."

She cracked her eye open to glare at him. "Don't you be comparing Jake Puckerman to my homemade magic moisturizing facial Blaine. _Don't you do it_."

"Yes'm" He said meekly.

She harrumphed. "I guess I could give him a chance."

Blaine grinned triumphantly, but quickly switched to a sympathetic head nod when she peeked at him suspiciously.

"But the second he messes with Unique, he's gonna be _eating_ that guitar of his. Unique will only accept being treated like the princess that she is."

"Unique for Prom Queen?" Blaine said unthinkingly. He froze as soon as the words hit his own ears.

Wade was very still in his chair. "Maybe." He said finally, and for all that his clothes and bust hadn't changed a bit, he looked so much _smaller_ than he had seconds ago. "Maybe I will." He straightened back up in chair, smiling as she tilted her head to let Blaine get at her other cheek. He slathered facial cream over it with shaking fingers.

"I'd vote for you." He said, and it feels like atonement.

"You be my king, and I'll be your castle." She sang.

Blaine let out a shuddery breath, and smiled. Thank god for music. "No you be my queen, and I'll be your moat!"

"I think my palace might have room for a court jester." Unique said grandly. "I suppose Jake can stay."

"Don't tell Sam." Blaine stage whispered. "He wouldn't like to know that his position's been usurped."

Unique's laugh was bright and happy. Blaine couldn't help smiling as he sang, "I'll cover you… in _cream_!"

They both laughed so hard that yoghurt got all over the _People_ magazines. Somehow, they didn't care.


End file.
